Last night I had a dream. An unusual dream, but I guess most dreams are fairly weird no matter what right? Our minds can come up with some strange things while we sleep. Actually I had two dreams last night. The first dream I had was no stranger to me. It’s a recurring dream I have often, but lately haven’t experienced it in a while. It’s that dream where I am in the end drowned by a brown bear. I’ll tell it from the beginning.
Usually it starts off with me walking with a goat into this little foresty area that is by one of the football parks I used to be at a lot when I was younger, because my brother played and my dad coached. The entrance to this little area is really quite far away from where the actual game was being held, way on the other side of the park and no one can see us. We go in and it’s really different from how it actually is of course. The trees are those super huge red sequoia trees, thick with leaves far, far up so that barely any sunlight comes in. Everything has sort of a red tinge to it from the trees. The goat and I start walking around, just exploring and checking things out. It’s really pretty in there. We hear the odd shuffling from far away every once in a while but just write it off as the normal activities of little creatures. It starts to get dark so me and the goat are trying to find our way back out. For some reason the way we came in no longer exists, so we have to find another way out. I can see a clearance in the trees with light coming through, so I know that it’s a way out. The only problem is that we have to go through a small valley in the middle of this little forest. And in that dip there are 2 huge brown bears pacing back and forth. I’m trying to see another way to get to the other side but of course I have to go through this bear pit. Me and the goat look at each other and slowly and quietly start to walk down the slope in to the valley. Why the hell we expected the bears not to hear or see us I have no idea. Of course they did. They start making their bear noises at us (what would you call that? Growling? I guess…) and charge at us. Scared to death, we start running super fast (this whole time the goat is on a leash that I am holding) and make it to the other side and up the slope. The bears continue to chase us. When we emerge on the other side I realize that this wasn’t a way out at all. All of a sudden there is a huge steep mountain in front of us, and the forest has disappeared behind us. We are now on a small island maybe 100m in diameter with this steep mountain in the middle. So where the hell should we go but up? We start running/climbing up this mountain as fast as we can. One of the bears gets the goat, this is a super traumatic event for me because apparently this goat was my only confidant. He understood me. I understood him. So as I am crying, and can barely see because of the tears clouding my vision, I keep going up. When I get to the top I realize there is nowhere else for me to go but down now, so I roll down the other side of this rocky, jagged mountain. I start running around the mountain and there are waves coming in and out of the tiny shoreline. You know how hard it is to run on wet sand? Well imagine that difficulty x5, just because my dreams like to fuck with my head. For some reason there is only about 2 feet of shoreline before it just drops down to super deep water with god knows what swimming around in it. I look back to see if the bears are still there, and one still is. So I keep running in circles around this mountain but take a wrong step and fall into the scary black water. I start swimming despite my fear and anxiety about what is living in this water. I look back once again and there is the bear, right behind me. He lifts his huge paw out of the water and slams it down onto my head. I go under water and that’s where the dream ends.
So that’s the first one. The second one was a lot shorter. I was at a Goo Goo dolls concert concert (I actually had to google this to make sure the song that they kept playing over and over again was theirs. How did my brain know that they sing this song but *I* did not? So weird man). Anyways, they kept playing Iris over and over again and I know all the words so I was singin’ along of course. For some reason there were only like…20 maybe 30 people there. And only I was singing so they made me go up on stage and sing. That’s about all that happened in that dream. It was fun.
The whole point of this post was to say that I want to try something called “image rehearsal therapy” for the bear dream. It consists of this:
1. Write out the text of the nightmare
2. Create a new ending for the nightmare story and write it out
3. Rehearse the new version of the story in your imagination each night just before going to sleep
4. Perform a relaxation exercise
Tonight I will try this and see what happens!